Thursday, April 30, 2009

"Mom"

Now, you all know me as "twinmama". This is something that I really enjoy. I just love being known by this - the mama of twins. Like most babies, my girls called me "mama" first.

I fell in love with it.

After all, "mama' is the sweet, innocent way babies call out for that woman who feeds them, changes them, loves them and plays with them. "Mama" is the first word used by our children to show they know who we are. That to me is very special and I wish that I could be called mama forever.

But nobody else seemed to go along with this. Everyone around me started referring to me as "mommy" so naturally the girls went from calling me "mama" to "mommy".

Okay. No big deal. "Mommy" is really sweet, too. Little ones usually say "mommy" so this is an accepted name for my occupation. I will embrace it because they will call me "mommy" for a long time and that is special...

A couple of days ago, Jelly Bean ran right by me and called me....."MOM". She has said it several times since.

What the? Uh, hello? Where in the world did that come from.....WHO'S BEEN CALLING ME MOM??

You may think, "Well, twinmama you are a mom, so what is the big deal?"

The big deal is that I call MY mom, MOM. I am 25.....fine....31 years old. (All of my family and friends are smirking as they read this..."You are going to be 32 in a couple weeks, twinmama, you could have rounded up." Well, this is my blog and it is acceptable here to round down when it comes to age.)

Anyway, I digress...

Where did this come from? Next week, am I going to be referred to as "Mother"? Perhaps by my first name or just a "Hey you, lady."

When my brother was 4 or 5 years old, he decided that he would start calling my Dad by his first name. Some people in my extended family thought it was downright offensive and thought he should have been punished. My Dad took it in stride and didn't make a big deal about it. No special attention was given to the matter and in less than one week, my brother started calling him "Dad" again.

So, I know what I need to do. I need to not make a big deal about it and continue referring to myself as "mommy" or "mama" and hope that she will come back around.

Otherwise, she is grown up enough to get a job. (And she's too short for a cash register and doesn't know enough words to work in customer service, so unless she goes into show business, she is better off to remember that she is only 2 years old and it is time for her to act like it!)

Whew...I'm not bitter. Really....But....

While I am on the subject and since our holiday is approaching soon (May 10th), how about we rename it to "Mommy's Day"? Or maybe we can personalize it to our own situation...mine will be called "Twinmama's Day".

"Mother's Day" seems so formal...so impersonal...so without hugs or kisses or being silly with our kids. It seems so "don't forget to wash behind your ears" or "just wait until your father comes home".

No matter what happens, I know that Jelly Bean will continue to need me for a long time. And I guess it is more important to be needed and wanted than it is to be addressed by a particular name. I know that deep down. I just need to tell my selfish self to get over it. I will still be there for them even when they don't want my help because that is just who I am.

And even though I call my mom, "Mom", I know deep down there will always be a time when I will need my "Mommy", too.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

The State of TLC09

So, after my post last week and how it is time to re-prioritize stuff around here, you might have been wondering what in the world happened to Twinmama's Lifestyle Challenge. Never fear, it will return! In fact, it will be back this Sunday, but there is one major change to it. Instead of being a weekly challenge, it will now be monthly challenges.

I figure 52 new things to do in a year is pretty rough and the most realistic success rate for something like that is 5-10%. So, let's say we all were able to accomplish, say 10% of the tasks, then that would be about 5 of the challenges. Hmm...that just doesn't seem to be enough.

Instead, I will post a new challenge the first Sunday of every month and we will have a full month to practice it. This will make the challenges more do-able and help us to get into a "habit" of doing the new task. (I read somewhere that it takes 3 weeks to form a habit, so this schedule will fit right into it.)

So, sit tight and on Sunday, we will get back on that saddle! Can't wait!!

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Dr. twinmama

In my family, I wear a lot of hats, but today I added another talent to my growing list of impressive skills as Chief Officer of Nurturing Eternal Souls. I am now Head Stuffed Animal Surgeon.

Yesterday, I came across a strange little plastic ball that resembled a bead. I didn't recognize what it was for quite awhile, but then it dawned on me that one of the stuffed animals had sprung a leak and was pooping beads all over the floor. There were several possible culprits since we could probably set up our own stuffed animal exhibit and charge the public to go on the tour.

Throughout the day, our brood of stuff animals had gone from the bedroom to the sunroom windows. Yesterday was the first 80 degree weather here in over 200 hundred days and all the windows were open. The girls loved being able to line up their little furry friends inside the window sills. From other parts of the house, I could look out the window and see the little backsides of a dog, pig, tiger, bear, monkey, etc. They thought it was fun. I thought it was a good chance for those little furballs to air out.

Two of the stuffed animals - Pig & Tiger - in particular have recently risen up the ranks as being an important part of the girl's lives. Jelly Bean has Bear who can never be replaced (Bear probably deserves his own post.) Peanut is quite smitten with her Bear who looks just like Jelly Bean's Bear, but there are differences and the girls know them. There are other friends who are well loved like the two Curious Georges, baby dolls and few odd stuffed animals like a turtle, frog and fish. (Mostly Peanut's favorites. Seriously, nothing else compares to Bear when it comes to Jelly Bean.)

Pig is Peanut's new BFF and Tiger is Jelly Bean's. Tiger may be more of a pet for Bear since Jelly Bean kind of dotes on Bear. Regardless, she has fallen for that striped cat and he is part of the Jelly Bean posse.

With all this said, Pig & Tiger have been playing hard core around here lately and unfortunately neither one could handle it. They are losing their marbles literally. (I understand what they are going through.) So, this morning as the girls woke up and went to play with these toys, I noticed the awful truth that they were injured. I had to take the beloved toys away from my girls. Panic set in.

"My pig! My pig!"

"No, mommy! Jelly Bean's tiger."

This was an all out emergency. I quickly ran upstairs to look for my sewing kit while I reminded myself that it had been a long time since I had put a needle and thread to anything. Could I actually fix the poor creatures? There was only one way to find out.

"Girls, Pig & Tiger need surgery. Mommy needs to make them better. They are sick."

I waited for the protests, but instead I got two very understanding little girls. Huh. Didn't think that would work...

I went into the kitchen away from the girls and started on Pig. He had a rip down his back. I first decided to fish out all of those little beads just in case he was ever re-injured in the same spot. I switched up his back carefully making sure there were no holes left. It wasn't the best job - no sewing or craft blogger would have been impressed, but it solved the problem. I presented Pig to Peanut.

"He came through surgery okay. He's a little groggy, but he's going to make it."

Peanut happily accepted him and ran off to find a window to stick him in.

Next, I inspected Tiger. He was much worse off which is surprising because he has been played with the least. Nevertheless, I stitched up his back after a good bead liposuction. Jelly Bean & Bear were waiting anxiously for their little friend.

"Well, Jelly Bean, Tiger is going to have a scar, but otherwise he is doing fine. Lots of hugs and kisses and he should be back to his old self very soon."

Jelly Bean planted a kiss on Tiger's forehead and off she went.

As I packed up my sewing kit, I thought about when I was a kid and how much I enjoyed my stuffed animals and dolls. I had several much loved furry friends that saw a lot of play time as a young child. These are usually our first friends in life and a gateway into the world of the imagination. We take them everywhere, have them experience the same adventures as us and use them to practice things on. (Jelly Bean yelled at Curious George today for being up on top of the cabinet. "Get down, George!" Interesting, she was just reprimanded for the same thing.)

Since children learn by watching us, it only seems reasonable they would need someone or something to practice on. Since their twin sister is usually not very cooperative because she is trying to do the same thing, naturally their abiding little fur-friends do the trick.

What's the most important thing they could practice on these inanimate objects?

Well, I believe it is loving and caring for something other than themselves. They have so much done for them at this age and as two year olds are naturally selfish little people, it is refreshing to see them trying to put a diaper on Pig or wheel Bear around in the wagon. I want them to learn love and affection and be the best person a friend, sister or husband could ask for. I want them to be the type of people that other's could call on to help them in their time of need. Lovingly. Unconditional.

If only every problem could be fixed with a needle and thread! Maybe it seemed really insignificant, but to those little girls I brought their friends back to them. The problem was solved and they were happy.

Maybe the next major twinfamily dilemma won't be as easy to fix, but in any case I think as long as I remember what's at stake then I will be ready to give it my best shot.

After all, I'm the mom.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Plates & Priorities

A few weeks ago, I hit a wall. A very large, probably brick, no wait...CONCRETE WITH STEEL REINFORCEMENTS wall. It kind of hurt. After rubbing the bump on my head, I realized that I just couldn't do it all anymore and had to throw something overboard for a time to get my priorities realigned. Guess what that was? You got it...I ditched the bloggy world.

Okay, I'm sorry! I didn't break up with you all! I really do love you all very much, but this twinmama was spread pretty thin and I had to figure out my schedule. Just like most moms, I have God to glorify, daughters to raise, a husband to love, a house to clean, family and friends' relationships to nurture and a job to work. That doesn't leave much "me" time at all.

So, you can say, that my plate cracked. I loaded it and loaded it and finally it couldn't withstand anymore weight.

Blogging has become one of my favorite hobbies. I enjoy writing very much and being able to chronicle my twin girls' lives is something that I really cherish.

Recently, I learned about a young mother who lost her life after being sick for awhile. I did not know her, but a friend of mine did. I was made aware that she had a blog of her own. As I visited her blog to find out more about her. I discovered she wrote and photographed her little boy's life with enthusiasm and introspect. I looked at her pictures and the sweet captions she wrote about her precious son and I cried.

Her son has the most precious gift in the world. He will always know how his mother felt about him. He knows because he can read it for himself. She took the time to journal his experiences. Experiences that he won't remember since he is so young, but he can see with his own eyes and not rely on someone else to try to recall to him.

A mother remembers details that even a father could never begin to remember. Why? Simply put, women are more detailed and mothers study their children. We have this insatiable need to count every hair of our precious babies in amazement. We get it honestly. In Matthew 10:30, it says, "But the very hairs of your head are all numbered." God knows every detail of each one of his children and I believe that He builds this desire in mothers, too.

As I wiped away my tears, it occurred to me that I really missed writing in my blog. I appreciate everyone who is reading my blog and I enjoy reading all of your blogs, too, but what I miss is writing about my favorite subject in the world! I want my children to know that I am watching them and taking notes on this fleeting thing called childhood. I want them to know, should anything ever happen to me, that I paid attention. They need to know that everything they do is of significance. And most important of all, they need to know how much I love them.

So, that old broken plate of mine? I threw it out. Time to re-prioritize.