Thursday, April 30, 2009

"Mom"

Now, you all know me as "twinmama". This is something that I really enjoy. I just love being known by this - the mama of twins. Like most babies, my girls called me "mama" first.

I fell in love with it.

After all, "mama' is the sweet, innocent way babies call out for that woman who feeds them, changes them, loves them and plays with them. "Mama" is the first word used by our children to show they know who we are. That to me is very special and I wish that I could be called mama forever.

But nobody else seemed to go along with this. Everyone around me started referring to me as "mommy" so naturally the girls went from calling me "mama" to "mommy".

Okay. No big deal. "Mommy" is really sweet, too. Little ones usually say "mommy" so this is an accepted name for my occupation. I will embrace it because they will call me "mommy" for a long time and that is special...

A couple of days ago, Jelly Bean ran right by me and called me....."MOM". She has said it several times since.

What the? Uh, hello? Where in the world did that come from.....WHO'S BEEN CALLING ME MOM??

You may think, "Well, twinmama you are a mom, so what is the big deal?"

The big deal is that I call MY mom, MOM. I am 25.....fine....31 years old. (All of my family and friends are smirking as they read this..."You are going to be 32 in a couple weeks, twinmama, you could have rounded up." Well, this is my blog and it is acceptable here to round down when it comes to age.)

Anyway, I digress...

Where did this come from? Next week, am I going to be referred to as "Mother"? Perhaps by my first name or just a "Hey you, lady."

When my brother was 4 or 5 years old, he decided that he would start calling my Dad by his first name. Some people in my extended family thought it was downright offensive and thought he should have been punished. My Dad took it in stride and didn't make a big deal about it. No special attention was given to the matter and in less than one week, my brother started calling him "Dad" again.

So, I know what I need to do. I need to not make a big deal about it and continue referring to myself as "mommy" or "mama" and hope that she will come back around.

Otherwise, she is grown up enough to get a job. (And she's too short for a cash register and doesn't know enough words to work in customer service, so unless she goes into show business, she is better off to remember that she is only 2 years old and it is time for her to act like it!)

Whew...I'm not bitter. Really....But....

While I am on the subject and since our holiday is approaching soon (May 10th), how about we rename it to "Mommy's Day"? Or maybe we can personalize it to our own situation...mine will be called "Twinmama's Day".

"Mother's Day" seems so formal...so impersonal...so without hugs or kisses or being silly with our kids. It seems so "don't forget to wash behind your ears" or "just wait until your father comes home".

No matter what happens, I know that Jelly Bean will continue to need me for a long time. And I guess it is more important to be needed and wanted than it is to be addressed by a particular name. I know that deep down. I just need to tell my selfish self to get over it. I will still be there for them even when they don't want my help because that is just who I am.

And even though I call my mom, "Mom", I know deep down there will always be a time when I will need my "Mommy", too.

7 comments:

Hajar Zamzam Ismail said...

Nostalgia. That is the biggest word in mommyhood. Nostalgia is a bittersweet, and daily feeling when you see the little babies you brought home from the hospital learning bigger words, throwing tantrums, pulling each other's hair, biting, pushing, fighting, and then turn around and being all giggles and sweetness and hugs and kisses.
I want another baby. Don't you?

Helene said...

Oh I can relate on so many levels. My babies are starting to call me "Mom" and it makes me kinda sad. I want to be Mommy and/or Mama at least a few more years!!

Kim said...

Just as long as my husband doesn't start calling me, "Ma" . . .

Stacy said...

Boy, I am feeling right the opposite! I wish that word would fall out of the language. I swear I hear that word about 600 times a day at least. Like Stewie from Family guy, "Mom, Mom, mom, mommy, mommy, mama, mama, mama.."

twinmama said...

LOL, Stacy! I completely see your point! There are definitely days I want to hide because I hear my name called so many times! :)

Asma Ahsan said...

I LOVE being a mama too - My daughters first word was mama!

My kids are like twins - just 13 months apart - Its tough brnging them up but SO rewarding! :)

I would like you to add to my tag BLOG
http://youvebeentagged.wordpress.com/

hope you add to the tag :)

Asma Ahsan

glitzen said...

I still call myself Mommy, even though my kids call me Mom most of the time. I love it! I still call my own mother "Mommy" every once in awhile. I need to. I just do. :)